Raquelle's Blog :)

I had a really cool conversation with a lady who I babysit for today. We started talking about ethics and morals. From there she dove into how everyone has their own truth by talking about perception. It was something along the lines of “I perceive the world a certain way and you might perceive it a totally different way.” I thought that was interesting because how can everyone’s perspective be right – what is the anchor point for perspective and what is truth? If everyone has their own truth and their own set of ethics, and some contradict each other, when deciding anything, what light do we hold the both of them up against to determine which is flawed? In her perspective, everyone is right in their own way, in her perspective they have their own truth and they can coexist with contradicting truths as long as it doesn’t affect others. The problem with that is we can’t produce all the answers. And our individuals truths can’t set us free. But the one true Truth I know can! I shared with her how I believe there is One truth, that God is truth and Light and in him there is no darkness at all. And then the conversation went on…

We started talking about adoption and I told her I wanted to adopt because not only does birthing a whole human sound terrifying a little bit, but 99% of the reason is that there are hundreds and hundreds of family-less, fatherless, motherless kids in our own city. She then said, “I want you to be careful about that way of thinking, though, cause right now you’re thinking of them as helpless.” and I understand what she meant – I should not assume that they need love a certain way or assume I know what’s best in the situation should I adopt, but in a way they are helpless to be in a family and belong and we welcomed into a home they need. I said I’d probably adopt a baby or a younger toddler or elementary student. And then she jumped on that and said, but the problem is, everyone adopt babies, that’s all people want cause there’s no baggage attached. And I said well yeah at 22 though I wouldn’t adopt a 15 year old even if I could. She looked me dead in the eyes and said why not, And I kinda laughed and said, “Its a seven year age gap.” and she said “and?” and I was at a loss for words because I wanted to laugh and be like “wait you’re serious?”

Then the topic of conversation turned to religion and she said “One thing I alway say is “You are the only person who can destroy you and you are the only person that can save yourself” This is such a classic way of secular thinking, and I was quick to interrupt before my nods were understood as agreements to her statements. I said, “Oh I don’t believe I can save myself.” And she acted kind of shocked and then I did a terrible job explaining what I meant but I should have said something that would have made her want to become a christian right then and there, like, ‘because Humans are fickle and God is so divine and he’s saved me from myself when I was so far in the depths that I could not see anything.or do anything. I have evidence of God doing stuff in my life that has changed me when everything I’ve done to will divine change has failed me. Humans have failed me and I have failed myself but God never has. He’s never given up on me.”

After I talked about taking a step back from going to church every week to rediscover what church means, she said, “I would really encourage you to take that traditional faith that you grew up with and discover something else for yourself and take parts of the religion and parts of what you’ve learned for yourself and make your own perception of the world.” And the most notable think out of all she said was, “Make your faith about what you want to do.” And I explained that yes, part of faith is bringing what I want to do to God, but 99% of faith is actually not about what I want to do, it’s about what God wants me to do. And I know she viewed my saying that like I’m in shackles to do the bidding of this big scary dude in the sky against my will. But the truth is, the more I spend time with him my desires are becoming his desires. So the more I plug in to what God is saying and wanting, my thoughts will become His thoughts and that’s how it will actually feel. Faith will be about what I want to do cause I will WANT to do that amazing thing God is already working in me, the courage to do!

So I messed up on some words and proved some points and learned something new and I just hope most of all God planted seeds in her heart and maybe she’ll feel good enough to walk into church someday soon and her life will be transformed by the healing power God has given someone to use to help change her life!